A Young Couple, ages 30 & 31, Makes Choice To Foster Teenagers

The following article is a story that caught my attention. Most of what I find as I read through news articles relating to foster care are stories of how foster parents are horrible people who mistreat the children who come into their care. This story warmed my heart as I read of this young married couple who realized that they were in a position to reach out to teens in need of a foster home, and then went after what they knew they wanted to do. Those of us who are foster parents have learned that teenagers often have a harder time finding a family who will take them in compared to younger children. Thanks to these two young adults, there are three less teenagers in the world who are wondering if anybody cares about them.

Duluth couple in their 30s are foster parents to teens
Jane Brissett, Duluth News TribunePublished Sunday, August 24, 2008

At Kevin and Kelly Erickson’s home in Duluth, the family of five eats dinner together each evening. Kelly, the mom, calls from work to see what the three teenage kids are doing. They all have chores. The family takes vacations together. The kids look out for one another.
In many ways, life in the Erickson family with three teenagers is quite ordinary.
What’s out of the ordinary is that the three unrelated teens are long-term foster children and the foster parents — Kevin and Kelly — are little more than a decade out of adolescence themselves.
While other couples in their early 30s are having babies, the Ericksons have jumped feet-first into parenting teens, a period that can be challenging in the best of circumstances.
In south St. Louis County, just five families in their 30s are foster parents to teenagers, said Rick Benson, a county social worker who works with the Ericksons in their roles as foster parents.
Kelly was a teenager herself when she became interested in foster parenting. Her brother’s placement in a foster home started her thinking about foster parenting as a way for her to help children grow up successfully.
“Foster care’s not a bad thing,” Kelly said as she sat with the family one summer evening in her Duluth home. “People think kids are in foster care because they’re bad kids, but they’re not.”
Kevin had little exposure to foster care until he and Kelly started dating. Before they began foster care about 3½ years ago, both mentored young people as part of the Mentor Duluth program, which they believe was good experience for foster parenting.
“They certainly are motivated to try to make a difference in the lives of young people,” Benson said of the Ericksons. “They have that attitude of community responsibility — that there are needs all around us here.”
When the Ericksons were preparing to become foster parents, they decided they wanted foster children from ages 6 to 12. But their plans changed after talking with Benson.
“Rick talked us into taking teenagers,” Kelly said. Generally, teenagers are the most difficult age to place.
Benson said the Ericksons’ ages — Kelly is 31 and Kevin is 30 — were an advantage because they were closer to adolescence than most people who take on teenage foster children. They probably can understand the wants and needs of kids better than older foster parents, Benson said.
Kevin, who works at Barnes & Noble and is a college student, and Kelly, who owns Payroll Processing Plus in Duluth, do all they can to promote a sense of family among the kids.
The Ericksons have no children by birth and don’t plan to. “This is our family. We don’t want to have our own biological children,” Kelly said. Other than one short placement that wasn’t a good fit, the three they are caring for are the only foster kids the Ericksons have had since they began foster parenting.
“We try as hard as we can to make everything family-oriented,” Kevin said. That includes everything from dinner together every night to vacations to attending extended-family functions. They’ve taken the kids to ValleyFair and Disney World.
The foster children who live with the Ericksons can’t be named or identified because of privacy concerns, but they clearly feel part of a family. They say they feel accepted and see Kevin and Kelly as loving parents, not caretakers.
However, the family has a structured environment with strict rules.
Not all of the kids were used to that when they came to the Ericksons’ and adjusting took some time.
Furthermore, the rules at the Erickson house are not always uniform.
“Different rules for different kids is our motto,” Kelly said. Each child has different needs and different circumstances, so the Ericksons try to recognize that by tailoring the rules to the individual.
The Ericksons see plenty of return for their efforts.
“The biggest reward is, I have a family. I have kids I look up to and adore,” Kevin said.
“Doing foster care,” he added, “is giving me a purpose in my life.”


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