Riding The Roller Coaster

I don't how I am feeling. A. came home from her monthly visit with her mom with some news. A. said that her aunt had attended this visit and that A. had told her that she really wanted her to try to adopt her if her mom lost parental rights. I was also told that her aunt is going to hire an attorney not only to look into adoption but also to look into being a foster home for A. first and then adopting her. I don't think I have anything to worry about because A. has been in foster care for 3 years now and this aunt has never pushed the issue of being a foster family for A. It is in the back of my mind that I seem to remember something about this coming up about a year ago and her aunt was going to do all that she could do to get A. to live with her, but I never heard anymore about it. I have a feeling that the aunt has already been told by our Agency that it is unlikely that she would be able to foster or adopt A.

That is the way I think things have happened. I'm not sure though. I can't imagine this aunt getting A. as a foster child, let alone being allowed to adopt her. But, anyone who has had any experience with the court systems knows that things don't always work out the way you would expect them to. So, I am a little fearful of what the outcome of this may be. But I am also tired of worrying about everything so much. So, I am going to try my hardest to sit back and relax and let this all happen however it is going to happen. I can't fight the system. Whatever is going to happen is going to happen. A. will be no better off with her aunt than she was with her mom, but she doesn't see it that way. She thinks she will be able to sneak visits with her mom if she is living with her aunt.

I've been on a roller coaster for the past 3 years with this case. The ups and downs are very draining. Just when we begin to think that everything is heading in the right direction, we suddenly find ourselves taking a dizzying, sharp turn on that roller coaster. It usually doesn't take long before the car we are riding in makes another turn and begins to head back in the right direction again. But then all of a sudden we find ourselves flying down a steep hill at a breathtaking speed. When we get to the bottom and feel as though all is lost and A. is probably going to go home, all of a sudden our car begins the long slow climb back up to the top of the hill where everything looks rosey again. We have just made another turn on the roller coaster and at this point I don't know where we are heading. So, this is where I just sit back and ride the ride to the end. I'm tired and I just want the ride to end.